No one starts out a butterfly
I’m a believer that guidance, inspiration, and encouragement come to us when we need them most. I’m also a believer that while we can’t force these things, we absolutely can put ourselves in the path of guidance so it can find us more easily. I believe friends can help put us on that path, too.
Which is how the words “No one starts out a butterfly” recently came to me when I needed them most — a few years ago, a friend I met through this email group sent me a small gift. It was the Authenticity Calendar, a beautiful collection of 365 daily quotes, which has sadly since been retired by the author and is now out of print. Over the years, I’ve read these quotes over and over again, flipping from one to the next each evening just before my shower, meditating on the day’s assigned quote while I get ready for bed, reading it again each morning, and sometimes copying it onto the pages of my journal.
These quotes have traveled with me across the years from house to house, rental to rental, and it was the first thing I installed on my bathroom shelf when we finally moved into our new home last spring. I’m always surprised how different quotes impact me each year, depending on what’s going on in my heart at the time. This year, “No one starts out a butterfly” just won’t leave me alone, and I have a sneaking suspicion why. . .
A significant personal transformation is taking place in this current season of mine. Something akin to this ⤵
(another quote from the Authenticity Calendar)
I’m not quite ready to talk about all that this new transformation entails, except to say this — it’s a transformation that’s been slowly emerging for over two decades now, one that’s not likely to stop until my heart beats its last beat and my body takes its last breath, one that is changing me from the inside out.
It’s a transformation that grows deeper with every book I read, every person I meet, and every reflection I write. Most recently, it’s been amplified by these good books: The Dance of the Dissident Daughter and Writing Creativity and Soul, The Happiest Man on Earth and The Tattooist of Auschwitz, Today Was Fun and How Books Can Save Democracy.
And just like the long strands of gray hair that now catch the light when I move just right and the deep laugh lines around my mouth growing deeper by the day, I don’t plan on ignoring or trying to change or cover up a single bit of it. I want to see this transformation for everything it is, in every facet. I want to let it affect the way people see me and more importantly, the way I see myself every time I look within or gaze into the mirror. I don’t want to hide from it not even one little bit.
I hope to share more later, in case it might help put you on the path where guidance, inspiration, and encouragement can easily find you when you need them most, too. But right now, I’m in the thick of it.
💛
So this week, even though I’m reading heaps, I don’t have a new book to share with you. In the mornings, I’m slowly working through The Dance of the Dissident Daughter. It’s taking a long time to digest, and I’m not about to rush it. In the evenings, I’ve been reading heavier novels. I just finished The Tattooist of Auschwitz. It nearly wrecked me. During the day, when I catch a break from work and homeschooling, I read on audio during short snowshoe walks outside. I just finished The Happiest Man on Earth and started something more light-hearted Hello Summer.
Maybe this is what a cocoon’s inner walls looks like.
Hopefully someone reading this might find courage today as you recognize the darkness around you might be cocoon walls, too.
💛
Wherever you are today, friend, I hope you’re safe, warm, loved, and taking care of yourself.
I hope you find a few quiet moments today, right now if you can, to connect with your soul, to find clarity about where you are in your own transformation, and to feel good about being you and becoming more of what makes you you.
I’m trying to do the same.
Although, last night I learned that a certain dangerous government-sanctioned group is headed here, to Maine, to the city where my son goes to school. So I’m in the throes of figuring out how to protect my family and friends, reading the guidance on how to prepare and what to do if approached, etc.
I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t upset, nervous, even fearful, so I won’t say that. I’ll just say I’m here, I’m keeping my head up, and I’m trying to look for the good.
All my love,
💛
Celeste
did AI write this? nope, this lady did ⤴ always💛