Why You Need to Put Yourself Out There Now

There’s something strange in my neighborhood right now. It’s been happening for weeks – all because I put myself out there in one small, simple way and said it big, bold, and loud that I’m ready for what comes next. And since no one ever talks about this side of the “how to actually get your dream” a.k.a. “how to become a well-known author” journey (the side where I’m not really well-known yet but I know it’s just around the corner because I care a lot about moms who are looking for encouragement and I’ve been working hard for years to be able to reach them), I’m going to tell you what’s going on.

I’m also going to tell you this story because I think it’ll prove why you need to put yourself out there right now too.

Here’s the story.

The other day a precious lady asked me to have coffee with her. She saw my book on the shelf in our Airstream rental and said, "I just wanted to meet you because you're the author of this book, right?"

I couldn't help but feel honored.

I self-published that book last summer, and while it's been such a blessing to share it with family-loving folks all over the world, it's just a self-published book. I go whole months forgetting it even exists.

Still, her words stuck with me ~ You're the author. 

She couldn't have known this, but just the week before, I had joined the Maine Writers Alliance and started seriously working on a new manuscript – one I got the idea for while driving to the hardware store, of all things. I have a bunch of book ideas and half-started manuscripts, but this one feels different. I've been writing little bits of it daily for weeks now. I have a goal tracker and everything.

Strange.


Then, a few days later, I walked into our local bookshop and felt strange again.

I love bookshops – big ones, small ones, big box ones, small, charming, indie ones – I've never met a book store I didn't love. I've been making myself a regular at them for years and years. (My husband and I even went there for dates when we were teenagers.)

And I've always been swept away by a familiar feeling walking through the front door – excitement about finding something new, reading all the jacket blurbs, and smelling a few untouched pages. But not this time.

This time, I felt like I wasn't there to read anything.

Instead, I felt my big dream calling me in a new way.

Strange, I thought.

For no reason at all, I pulled out my phone and took a photo of the book displays at the store entrance, and it hit me: "My books are gonna be right here one day."

Then, reality reminded me that I don't even have a literary agent and publishers aren't exactly making my phone ring incessantly like they do for Julie in that movie Julie & Julia. (gosh, I love that movie)

Still, I couldn't shake the feeling.

So, after visiting my favorite sections and coming up empty, I headed straight for the Personal Growth section and before I even knew what I was doing, I found the place where books by authors with O last names, like me, live. I located where the last name Orr would fit on that shelf, scooted in some space, and took this photo ⤵

 

By this time, my kids were starting to realize I was having a moment. So they came up beside me with curious looks on their faces.

“That's my spot,” I told them. “One day your mama's books are going to fill that spot on this shelf so full they're gonna have to make a new one.”

(Because it's not just one book I plan on putting there – it's a bunch.)

I feel pretty sure they thought I had lost my mind. (It happens a lot right now; I'm fine with it.)

A few days later, I found myself letting go of some of my paid consulting work to make space in my life – a risky move, for sure, but one I strangely felt I had to do for multiple reasons. Writing was definitely on the list.

And I'm not even joking when I tell you that the very next day, I got an email out of the blue from a start-up travel magazine asking me to be a regular paid contributor. And a few days later, a pitch I sent into another travel magazine was accepted – also paid (which, if you don't know, isn't that common for writers who typically get pushed into the "mommy blogger" category and usually gladly get paid with exposure).

Not a book deal, granted, but I couldn't help but feel like it was a little wink from heaven saying, "Hey, I see what you did there and I like it."

It still feels strange.

Even now, as I write this to you, I want to chicken out, delete this draft, and instead write something related to hugging our kids more, getting cozy with this fall weather that's starting, or any other of the 100+ togetherness tips I've published online since 2019.


But I hope I'll be brave enough to publish this instead because I think it's important. I especially think you need to hear this ⤵

When we take small steps toward our biggest dreams and put it out there that we want something with our whole heart, strange things start happening.

Good strange.

Very good strange.

(nothing at all like Slimer – who I know you've been thinking about since reading the first line of this post)

And just like I've said so many times before ⤵

If we want our kids to go after their biggest dreams, we have to show them the way by going after our biggest dreams, too.

It doesn't mean we're selfish and it won't take us away from them.

If we do it the family-loving way, it can even bring us closer to them and give us something to talk about for years and years to come.

(like my friend Kristen brilliantly said in the podcast we made together a few months ago)

That's what I'm shooting for, at least, and I know it can happen because I've seen it before.

Every time I go after a big dream of mine, I get closer to my family in ways I never knew I could, because that's my intention – it's on my mind, written all over my heart, and 100% what I've told God again and again I want.

What about you?

What big dream has been bubbling up in your mind and heart since you read the first few sentences of this post?

What's still on your heart to do – even though you're not qualified, no one like you has ever done it before, you think you might be too old (you're not), or you don't have the time?

If I know you at all, I bet there's something.

That's why I'm gonna be brave and hit publish on this post and tell you about my big dream.

Even if it hasn’t come true just yet.

Maybe you'll be brave and come over to the email group to tell me about yours?


So here's where the story ends for now.

I can't tell you that I got a call just yesterday from an agent or publisher who's dying to work with me. (Although I do hope to be able to tell you something along those lines soon.)

For now, it's just this:

I know I’m meant to write books that encourage moms to fight for their families, to do life in a way they feel good about, and to love their kiddos with all their hearts even when the whole world calls them weird or crunchy or whatever.

And I'm gonna do it even if no agent or publisher ever calls me. (I'm gonna start calling them instead anyway.)


Thank you for reading this – now I'm really fired up.

I hope sharing that little spark gets you fired up for your big dreams today, too. I hope it means I’ll see you putting yourself out there today, too.

And I hope you experience so much good family togetherness because of it.

If you’d love to receive encouragement like this on the regular, I’d love to see you in the Togetherness Redefined email group.

Or if you're ready for a major jump-start for your dream, I've just put my email programs back on the top menu here at togethernessredefined.com. I'd love for you to see if one could serve you – here's the link.

And as always, I love that you’re here, that you’re reading this post, and that you made it to the bottom – just wanted to say thank you.