If you're struggling to take care of yourself

If you're enjoying a relaxing week on the beach as you open this blog on your phone for a quick scroll, I want to hug you right now, thank you for popping in, and then suggest that you might want to schedule a reminder to read it again a couple of days after you get home.

Or, if you're in a busy season right now and you're struggling to take care of yourself this summer, I want to give you a hug right now too and share a little something I hope will help.

First, a little photo I took just before Monday's 4th of July fireworks show in Bar Harbor⤵

Whenever I see this photo, it reminds me to stop and breathe. (Which is probably why it's my phone background right now and might be forever.)

Now, a few words from my new manuscript about taking care of ourselves. . . ⤵

I feel like I just broke out of jail.

The warden in my mind has been chaining me inside, reminding me how much needs to be done, telling me I don't have time to leave home, shouldn't take time off from my to-do list, and definitely can't step away from my computer or phone in case someone needs me or something comes through that needs my attention.

If I stay there long enough, I prove the warden right—my to-do list doesn't go away and calls and emails come in that do need my attention. So I ignore what I need, lose myself in one task after another, start feeling my brain enter its now-familiar dull ache, and only realize I've lost my entire day hours later when my phone buzzes telling me it's time to pick up my boys from camp.

I did that yesterday. And the day before.

Not today.

Today, the sun is shining so brightly outside my window and the temperature is just right for a nice long walk, hiking, swimming, biking, paddleboarding—anything but staying inside.

So I tell the warden where he can shove it and head out the door.

I tell him the to-dos will be here when I get back and the emails can wait a while longer.

I reason that if I don't take care of myself, they won't be done well anyway, so I might as well take care of myself now. He chases me for another 30 minutes or so, but then, I'm out.

I'm free.

It feels good to take care of myself for a little while.

Then, I come back home, surprise myself with how much more I get done and how much better I show up for my family when my own cup is full, and start the whole process over again tomorrow.

This is how it goes with taking care of ourselves—we have to fight for it.

Often fighting against ourselves in the process.

Sometimes we win —we take breaks, drink plenty of water, go on walks, stare at the ocean, spend time in our journals, read good books, hike mountains, and call friends.

Other times, we tamp down our needs and just carry on.

And sometimes all that carrying on happens again and again until we can't carry another thing and we break. That's what happened to me last summer — I pushed past my exhaustion again and again, took on task after task for months, put off all vacations and mini-vacations, and found myself melting into a puddle of tears in front of strangers at a fall retreat saying, "I just can't do this anymore."

I can't afford to go there again.

So, I've started asking myself (and my friends) a new question lately ⤵

What are you doing to take care of yourself this week?

And I'm building a list.

Here's what I've got so far ⤵

➳ Reading a good book on the porch
➳ Going for long walks and solo adventures
➳ Getting outside nature-therapy-style
➳ Opting for easier meals — box kits, takeout, or even cereal for dinner sometimes
➳ Getting really organized
➳ Sleeping late one day a week
➳ Asking for help (Doing less)
➳ Asking, How's your inner life right now? What do you need? What do you want? (& for an extra boost, journaling about it)

Your turn.

Seriously, I want to know⤵⤵⤵

💓 What are you doing to take care of yourself this week?💓

Come on over to the email group and chime in. (I’d love to have you!)

I'm kicking myself out of my house and away from my phone and computer for a while, but when I head back into my email, I hope to see a message from you there about how you're taking care of yourself.