A Conversation about Mental Health and Motherhood with Paola Sur
Today I want to lean in with you and have a conversation about mental health and motherhood. It’s a conversation I’ve danced around for years, watching some mom friends struggle and suffer while others have hidden against the mental health stigma that never seems to quit. Lately, though, I’ve started to see so many women (and men) in my life rise above all the reasons not to face their mental health issues, and as I’ve seen their courage and how beautiful it is, I’ve started to find my own. In today’s togetherness tip and podcast interview with Paola Sur, we’re tackling the topic of mental health and how it affects motherhood - and how we can all find what we need to use our commitment to being mentally healthy for our family’s benefit.
First, I’ll share the short version of my story:
“Are you willing to take control of your anxiety?”
That question hit me hard - especially since I didn’t even think I had anxiety. I mean, wasn’t anxiety something that caused panic attacks or was at least more serious than my little worries? Sure, I woke up in the middle of the night sometimes drenched in sweat with a serious worry reel dancing in my head and I often felt paralyzed by chest pains and horror-movie-worthy scenarios that randomly played on the movie screen of my mind, but didn’t everyone?
Then I realized that no, those things aren’t normal - especially as they kept getting worse and worse when my mom passed away and started hitting me full-on when my husband had a health scare, taking whole chunks of nights and days away in constant unrealistic worries.
I had to be willing to take control of my anxiety. I didn’t like feeling like it was taking control of me and affecting my family.
Thankfully, I had help - mainly in the form of some very brave people in my life who I have watched overcome their own mental health challenges.
Standing in awe of their bravery helped me find my own.
Admitting I was struggling was the first step and getting help so that my mental health could thrive was the second.
So now I have a daily yoga, journaling, and meditation/prayer practice, and I take supplements, make sure nothing gets in the way of my nature therapy sessions, talk about my anxiety with my friends and family, and try to be quick to admit when I need more help.
Sometimes, though, that’s not enough and it takes more of my attention. Sadly, you probably know what I’m talking about.
There’s too much of a stigma - too many people thinking their only option is to bottle up their feelings, “get over it already”, or take a hastily prescribed medication in secret.
It can feel too hard to speak up and get help sometimes, and when we do, we’re often misunderstood with people thinking we’re weak or fragile or need constant checking in on or can’t function.
When are we going to stop pretending we can be everything to everyone at every moment and finally take care of ourselves?
When are we going to get rid of the stigma and our own unconscious bias about mental health?
When are we going to realize that standing up for our own mental health is a HUGE way to show love to our family - and a BIG family togetherness win for generations to come?
Right now - that’s when.
Sharing our stories can help.
Stepping out and talking about how mental health issues have shown up in our families in the past can help, too.
Because whether we realize it or not, every single family has been touched by a need for mental healthcare just like every single family has been touched by a need for physical healthcare.
Sadly, it’s most often the mental stuff that goes untreated (and causes significant damage) for far too long.
But I have a feeling we are the generation changing that.
That’s why today’s podcast and videocast with writer, author, and anxiety warrior Paola Sur is one I’m so proud to share.
If you’ve ever struggled with anxiety - or have a family member who has fought any type of mental health issue - I hope you find so much strength here.
(And I hope you’ll come over to the email group after you listen and share your story, too.)
A few links from our discussion:
Paola’s book The Anxious Mom Manifesto
Paola’s blog & newsletter
Celeste’s “How to Chase the Mama Blues Away” togetherness tip
Celeste’s book
Help for getting into a daily journaling practice at Mamas Who Write
Hop over to the videocast here ⤵
Here are a few of my favorite moments from the interview:
“You CAN control the anxiety monster and keep it from controlling your life - it’s about the mind, body, and soul.”
“We have to remove the stigma about mental health.”
“It’s going to be a monster I can master and make work in my favor.”
Want to connect with Paola?
You can connect with her here and order your copy of The Anxious Mom Manifesto here.
Want to connect with Celeste?
You can connect with her here.
Want to find more support for your own personal growth?
Come over to our free email group and introduce yourself. Talk about your questions and get some inspiration from our togetherness tips every Friday morning.
(And if you’re feeling inspired, I’d love to see you over at Mamas Who Write.)
I’ll see you there!