What is Hygge? A Simple Way to Create Connection at Home
Why is it that motherhood can sometimes feel like swimming in quicksand?
One sunny afternoon while the rest of my family was busy with school projects, sword battles, and chores, I snuck outside and plopped down on the porch, looking for an escape. I hated to admit it, but I was at my wit’s end. I was at the end of a week where my boys were being extra loud, extra silly, just plain extra, and I was feeling more disconnected from them than ever. My husband was busier than ever, stretched way too thin by a million projects (I was too), and even our weekly date nights weren’t helping us really connect.
I knew I needed help.
So I downloaded a podcast app and searched for something that would inspire a deeper connection at home. After just a few minutes of searching, I found two moms talking about something they were doing in their house that was bringing them so much joy – hygge. They talked about twinkle lights, baked goodies, and hot drinks while reading books. One went on snow walks with her kids and came home to do coffee and books with them. The other made a cocoa station and listened to podcasts and audiobooks with her kiddos by the fireplace. I was instantly intrigued. But even after listening to the entire podcast, I still wondered,
“What is hygge and will it help me create the connection at home I want?”
To most of us, it’s an odd word: “hygge” (pronounced hoo-ga). It’s a concept that comes from Denmark – a small idea that reached international renown back in 2016. That podcast was my first introduction to hygge and it’s been bringing connection back to my family ever since (when I remember to do it). Still, I knew there had to be more to it than what I was experiencing.
I wanted to know more.
So, I bought The Little Book of Hygge by happiness researcher Meik Wiking. I was pleasantly surprised to learn that, at its heart, hygge is really all about family togetherness (and you already know that’s something I’m both curious and passionate about). So I was instantly a fan. As I dove into the concept more and more, I found it a refreshing call to simplicity, nature, and genuine relationships – all things that bring connection and make my life as a mom easier, healthier, and happier.
As I write this, my kids are much older than they were that first day I heard about hygge, and there are still loads of days when I still feel like I’m swimming in quicksand. Trying my best to keep it all going and have the kind of connection at home I’ve always dreamed of. Failing hard and trying again.
Just last night, I was whining to everyone about how I wish we could do something other than video games and movie nights to unwind together in the evenings. I pulled out a novel I’ve been meaning to finish and parked myself by the fire to read it. And we were doing it – we were hygge-ing. It was lovely, even if only for a little while.
If you’re wondering what hygge is and whether or not it could help you create connection in your home, here are a few family togetherness ideas from the book.
Gather around a fire.
Drink a hot drink together.
Bring natural materials into your home.
Play a board game.
Have friends over for dinner or tea and cookies.
Build a mini library in your living room.
Slow down, sit down, and rest together.
Watch a movie together with cozy blankets.
Get outdoors no matter the season. (like camping at Maine’s Baxter State Park - here’s a guide I wrote about it on pg. 15 of RV Today)
Light a candle (or five candles).
Read a book together or separate books in the same space.
Ride bikes.
Bake something yummy and decidedly unhealthy (cake, cookies, cinnamon rolls).
Share soup with a friend.
Create a picnic space in your garden.
Go on a nature walk.
Pick apples or forage mushrooms as a family.
Curl up in bed and practice a simple, quiet journaling technique (like this 3-step one I wrote about recently).
As you already know, building connection at home is an ongoing (often inside) job, and there’s no single answer.
It takes attention and effort, action and surrender, thought and intention, and all kinds of investments. Hygge makes it easier for me and my crew, and I hope after reading this, you’ll feel family togetherness grow a little easier for you, too. Or at least you’ll know a little more about what hygge is and what it has to do with you.
Want to know more about hygge and family togetherness?
Here are 10 more ways to go hygge and get cozy with your crew.
Want encouragement like this in your inbox on the regular?
Come join our group of family-loving folks in the email group. I’d love to see you there!