The Rarest and Purest Form of Generosity
This morning while thinking about how to sum up all that’s been swirling around in my heart and mind lately, a song from the early 00s floated into my consciousness. . .
It’s not surprising, hey? And a timely reminder for us all, if I say so myself. Because not only are we right in the middle of the season for buying all the things, this year the price of nearly everything has been creeping up at an ever-increasing pace.
Also, it’s true — love really doesn’t cost a thing. But there’s a great big but in there, too. Because gifts do actually cost money, even homemade ones, and some of us really do like to show our love with giving great gifts during the holiday season.
There’s the time factor , too— it takes time to choose just the right thing, to buy or make it, to plan ahead so it arrives on time. Between the money and the time (and the time that’s money for those of us who are running businesses or self-employed), sometimes worry can creep right on in and stay for days.
So I thought I would share a quote I’ve been mulling over that’s become my remedy for every single one of my gift-buying worries and budgetary woes. . .
"Attention is the rarest and purest form of generosity."
~Simone Weil, 1942
These words came to me in a weekly newsletter sent by James Clear (author of Atomic Habits) a couple of weeks ago and haven’t left my mind since.
It couples well with J. Lo’s 🎶 love don’t cost a thing 🎶 and funnily enough, another ballad in my headphones right now, 🎶 everything means nothing if I ain’t got you 🎶 .
Attention. It’s all about attention.
Even the best gifts pale in comparison to a few simple things⤵
Are you really listening when they talk about what they love?
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Do you make eye contact when you share a meal together?
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Do you authentically want to know who they really are, what they’re interested in, and what kind of things light them up?
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Are you willing to put down what you’re doing when they walk in the room?
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Are you available for the people you love?
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That’s really, truly it. Along with this, maybe. . .
"Love isn’t saying, I love you, but calling to say, did you eat?"
~Marlon James
A quote that also came to me from James Clear, and one that’s particularly comforting for those of us with adult children, kiddos in college, or teenagers who want to drink Red Bulls and coffee and eat ramen all day every single day for months on end (not that I would know anything about that, clearly).
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In full transparency, this isn’t something I always get just right. I get distracted or impatient mid-conversation. I have mood swings. I get carried away with work and find myself spending way too many nights and weekends on my computer.
But every day is a new day, every moment a fresh start.
I hope that encourages you.
Especially if things have been hard this year. Especially if you’re someone who’s concerned about money or the state of the world or a person you love right now. Especially if you’re someone who finds the holiday season difficult some years, maybe especially this particular year.
You.
Your people just want you.
That’s pretty great, if you ask me.
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It’s been COLD in my neck of the woods this week — like 1°F last night and 10+ inches of snow in the past five days kind of cold. Absolutely perfect good-book weather, in my opinion.
So I’ll be cozying up inside this weekend with one of my new Sue Monk Kidd books and getting out for snow walks whenever the clouds part enough to give us some sun. (Snow-walking is killer core exercise, by the way — I’m loving it!)
I hope you’re staying warm this weekend, enjoying the best parts this season has to offer, and reading all the good books you can find ~ and hey, did you eat?
If you ever want to chat about this stuff, I’m just an email away. Always.
💛
Celeste